SOMETHING TO PONDER
The year was 1958 and I was a nine-year-old pupil in Class 2 of St Andrew’s school in Totteridge. I spent five, happy childhood years at this school and have some very lovely memories of it. Even now, sixty three years later, I remember the place quite clearly. I recall the large airy classrooms with enormous windows, that could only be opened or closed by means of a long pole with a hook at the end. It was considered a great treat to be allowed to use this pole and as soon as the request was made for ‘someone to open the windows,’ hands shot up and there was an immediate clamour of “Me Sir,” “Me, Sir.”
Our classroom contained fifteen, front facing, double desks, each equipped with its own inkwell. The desks were arranged in three rows, of five desks per row. There was sufficient space between the rows to allow the teacher to saunter up and down, surveying the pupils’ exercise books.
At the front of the class, there was a small, raised dais, accommodating the teacher’s desk and a huge blackboard. There was also a shelf for the chalk and blackboard erasers. Every so often, the erasers had to be taken outside for cleaning, which was achieved by banging them against a specially designated, external wall. This was a most unpleasant job, because you ended up coughing, spluttering and covered with clouds of chalk dust. Strangely enough, it was also a job that was much sought after, especially by the boys. In fact, the teacher would often mete out this particular task as a treat or reward. Sadly, the erasers were also used for a purpose far less noble than that of erasing chalk. They made ideal missiles for lobbing at unruly pupils and some teachers indulged in this practice with great gusto.
Our class teacher, Mr Smith, was super strict but nonetheless held in great esteem by his pupils. He was generally adored by the girls and tolerated by the boys.
“Smithers” as he was known, had an idiosyncratic routine which he carried out sporadically. He would stroll leisurely down the aisle between the desks and, on returning, would deliver a smart cuff round the back of the head to each boy, with the exception of the West Indian lad, who got two cuffs. It must be noted that this was not in any way associated with the lad’s colour, it was solely because he was exceedingly naughty. It must also be noted that no girl was ever at the receiving end of this procedure.
“This is not, (whap) for what you have done (whap) that I know about, (whap)” Smithers would chant, ”It’s for what, (whap) you have done (whap) that I don’t know about."
Ponder for a moment, on the number of present social expectations that were contravened during this exercise and consider where it would leave him today.
In Smithers' defence:
TOO MANY ‘ISMS’
Too many ‘isms’ and too much ‘j’accuse.’
Can only cause schisms with the ‘isms’ you choose:
Ageism, racism, sexism, smack-ism,
Cubism, nudism, pat-on-the-back-ism.
The continual clamour for ‘social correctness’
Impinges on candour and stifles directness.
Back in the 50’s, few ‘isms’ were found,
And ‘social correctness’ was thin on the ground.
We’ve now turned the tables, the outlook ‘s quite bleak,
We’re smothered with ‘isms’ and correct ‘social speak’
Maggie Smart
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