MY SISTER-IN-LAW'S-SISTER
Carole’s not my sister-in-law; she is the sister of my sister-in-law (who was married to my late brother.)
If you are finding this at all confusing, I’ll explain further, it’s no bother.
Whilst she’s not exactly in the family circle, Carole is certainly on the periphery,
From where she is free to establish her own boundaries of proximity.
Being peripheral, she is exempt from having to buy expensive Christmas and birthday presents for the multitudinous relations.
But is welcomed with open arms when it comes to dinner parties and other such-like celebrations.
Furthermore, there’s no need for her to get involved in family squabbles and feuds,
Or wrestle with any other problematic interludes.
We were delighted to have Carole as quasi family, because she brought with her an air of elegance, charisma and flair,
And a successful career in acting, of which we were well aware.
She also brought Patrick:
Patrick was an ex-army officer, now retired.
Who was always immaculately groomed and impeccably attired.
One of nature’s gentlemen, although there is a minor thing to note,
He was no sort of gentleman whatsoever, when he was on his boat.
One sunny day in summer, a small family group of us had been invited by Carole, to lunch with them on board.
Then take a trip down river, from where the tributaries could be explored.
The men and boys were straightaway dragooned to help Patrick cast off the vessel,
This involved manipulating all kinds of complicated ropes and knots, with which they had to wrestle.
Suddenly, there was an almighty rumpus, consisting of barked orders, interspersed with streams of invective.
Which as a means of capturing ones attention, or scaring one half to death, was most effective.
Patrick, as Carole calmly explained, had transitioned into Captain Bligh of ‘Mutiny on The Bounty’ fame.
It appeared that whenever he took charge of a boat, it was always the same.
However, although at the time, admittedly, it did cause some alarm.
In general, it didn’t detract at all from Patrick’s natural charm.
To summarize, he’s not my brother-in-law, he’s the spouse of the sister of my sister-in-law.
I trust I’ve explained it succinctly and that there’s no need to provide further information or tell you more.
Maggie Smart
Comments